I was born to a family who enjoys playing card games, especially cribbage, so I will use this analogy:
Fate is the cards you're dealt. The circumstances that happen to us beyond our control.
Destiny is how you use the cards. How you manage the circumstances. It's working with what you can control.
Let's use an example of a woman with a cancerous tumor. Her name is Lisa.
She feels fated to receive the cancer, but decides she wants to beat it. She wants to be cured.
She learns about how her cancer was a manifestation of her deep feelings of fear and trouble forgiving the past.
How her cells lost their leader and are screaming for her to love and lead them once again.
She learns more about epigenetics and reads about alternative health treatments. She attends Zoom seminars about mind re-programming. She learns about alkaline vs acidic body environments.
She studies the emotional connection to physical illness. She reads everything by Louise Hay and starts affirmation techniques.
She listens to healing hypnosis videos. She uses repetition.
Lisa diligently implements everything she has learned and the next time she gets tested, the tumor has almost fully disappeared.
The doctors are flabbergasted, and Lisa realizes that although fate dealt her a hand, she used the cards in the best way possible to create her destiny.
Now Lisa is teaching others everything she has learned and helping them beat their own cancer. The fated cancer turns out to be her destiny because she made it so.
Affirmation: I use the cards fate dealt to me in the best way possible to create my own destiny.